Lakewood changes name to Apartmentwood to express vision for year 30

The community formerly known as Lakewood entered a new era in its 30th year when a new name took effect on April 1, reflecting the city’s vision and accomplishments: Apartmentwood.

“This new name captures our commitment to apartments and not much else,” said then-Mayor Armistice G. Ivarsclams, who was mayor of what was then Lakewood when the decision was made in December 2025 by the 2023-2025 Lakewood City Staff Council.

The meeting did not begin with this name as a given, and in fact, the December 31 meeting had begun with another new name on the horizon: Riverside Apartments on Gravelly Lake-Wood.

This was a reference to a specific apartment complex that is being constructed in the city on the site of a former library complex.

“We believe that by naming the entire city as Riverside Apartments on Gravelly Lake-Wood, the city declares its commitment to serving the most underserved of residents,” said the project’s attorney, Armistice G. Ivarsclams Jr. “It won’t hurt with marketing our complex, either.”

Several council members including Mayor Ivarsclams praised the new name and project which qualifies under the new special Washington Legislature Affordability Project. Rents will start in the low $3,700’s a month. The complex qualifies as it will displace several small businesses and will also replace trees, which use resources such as water and air that could instead be used by people who vote for legislators.

“Our innovative design, which will have no parking at all, and no trees to take up space that belongs to diverse and underrepresented individuals, will be highlighted during the next session of the Washington State Legislature and provide valuable publicity to our city,” said one of the architects designing Riverside Apartments on Gravelly Lake, Armistice G. Ivarsclams III.

However, an unexpected twist came when City Manager Dwight Wright pointed out that the actual council agenda – which had been provided to the public in advance – proposed the name Apartmentwood. 

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but that is what’s on the agenda. Apartmentwood is the name proposed by staff,” he noted.

Council members immediately apologized for the confusion. “We briefly forgot who we are supposed to represent,” said Council Member Belinda Marsh. “It was particularly grievous since we all promised the city manager in separate meetings that we’d vote for Apartmentwood. It’s amazing how you can get distracted by a new idea.”

Several council members of the city formerly known as Lakewood pointed to the bracelets on their wrists which say WWAHDD (What Would A Housing Developer Do). They received the friendship bracelets during a recent lobbying trip to the Legislature. 

The motion to approve Apartmentwood as the new name passed 7-0.

Representatives of the Riverside Apartments at Gravelly Lake said they felt included in the new name Apartmentwood and promised to maintain a good attitude as they continue to serve on the Apartmentwood Planning Commission. 

The two members of the public present at the council meeting expressed mixed or no feelings about the new name, perhaps since neither was from the City Formerly Known as Lakewood.

“No one has even taken my coffee order yet,” said Erika Sarasota, who looked confused as she wandered the large space, asking for a barista. “This is Starbucks, right?”

The other member of the public said he did not have strong feelings about the new name. “I have heard of this promised land called Parkland, am I there yet?” said the man who identified himself as Freedom Hero Jr. “Where’s the bus station?”